Thursday, August 19, 2004
Blog
Its been a while since I update my blog entry dun u tink. Wat have I been up to lately
I got the slightest idea at the moment. All I noe that I have been extremely tired and lethargy got the best of me it seems the past few days.
At work nothing much activity is going on the same old stuff.
I guess its my lack of having proper sleep. Usual my mum is in the ‘state’ again. She is losing weight.
Then there is some personal conflict which I usually wants to avoid but gets the better of me. How I wish…but its too late to wish for it already happen…….
Ok lar I will update again………
Btw tdy is my English oral,..wonder how I will fare this round………
posted @ Thursday, August 19, 2004
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Friday, August 06, 2004
Dear blog
It is Friday already. What have I been doing for the last few days? 
The same old routine life. Home Work Home again. I got no time to update as usual at work coz under colleagues scrutiny. So I can only check and update my blog during lunch time.
My previous blog was on a Monday. Let me recap. 
Maybe I will update my blog once or twice a week. Depends on my mood.
Opps seems like my memory is failing. 
Maybe I should start updating myself. I have been busy preparing for my studies, doing up revision notes as part of self revision. I planned for October the whole month as intensive studying. Life never gonna be easy 
when u try to juggle as a daughter, student, friend, colleague & being a gf. Really need to organise my schedule. So far so gd, I can cope but at times ………..i wish things could turn better…hahahah forget one more thing, being an avid reader, im pushing myself to complete reading 3 novels in one week. Im trying very hard here 
. Coz the book is due soon and all 3 is my fav books hehehhe…I can do it….no worries my studies will still be ongoing.
From Tuesday to Wed, nothing major happen that’s prominent enough for me to create a post for my blog.
Thursday
Things go well today at work. Not much work, able to loosen up a bit. Can even chit chat here & there. My mind is not at work but SHOPPING. Remember I got a S$150 Isetan voucher for my birthday from my notti bunch of loveable colleagues 
. I went shopping with my bf. Aiyoh to buy jeans/pants for me is so difficult, either the cutting is too tight or not my type or too expensive. Sigh 
. Why lar Isetan never include the likes of Baleno, Giordano Bossini sigh…all also branded in Isetan, when I wanna buy its like I am thinking thrice hahahaha. Im a shopaholic but not shopping blindly. I like to buy things value for money. In the end of my desired shopping list I manage to get my white handbag and a real cheap jewellery set. Real worth as they are slashing down prices until 12 Aug. I extend my joy of shopping to my bf as well. I gave him 50 percent of the voucher. He manage to get a great casio watch with that value. Seeing him happy makes me happy too 
. Guess what? I still have S$60 voucher have yet to be spent. Save it for later….when the need arises…though happy but an aching leg & sore blistered feet due to new show is wearing me out. 
Mum & Dad
I love my parents very much…………..mum is getting better …she can cook….happy …..sleeping….Dad more independent….but more grouchy at times,….
As a daughter, I pray to GOD for the best of health…and more….
Now for some personal affairs
Dearest BF
At times he can be real sweet and all but when he starts preaching about certain stuff 
, he always makes me feel that im young and immature 
. I know when he highlight abt a point, it rings a bell to me but he keep adding more and more that sometimes I dun feel like wanted to say anything no more, then what im trying to say, he juz took little attention, juz go ahead with his rights.
I aware that this is part of discovering each other’s personality & family background at a greater height but do give me a chance where im given freedom and speech and agree with me for once.
Is it my fault again? Over reaction again? No idea dun wish to probe any further. I juz feel to share it with blog dats all. My bf has seek apologies and I accept his apologies with an open heart. The thing I like being with him is that at times he can be relenting..and able to accommodate to my temperaments…& at times its me to him…hahahahaa…..ironic isn’t it. We are opposites but magnetic forces is very strong… 
..u know its more to a scientific things,…we call it magnetic field…opposites attracts…hahahha..dats why we are able to withstand for the 3 years…insyaallah for more years…..till…..only GOD knows….
Today
Office
A lot of them are on leave today yahoooooo dun feel like working feel likes wanna play hehehehe..
Ok then ...will be back soon
posted @ Friday, August 06, 2004
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Monday, August 02, 2004
Dear Blog
its yet another week had gone with just the blink of the eye. Sigh 
. What have i accomplished during the weekend? Hmmm, my agenda is to clean my wardrobe but unachieve coz im helping my elder sis clean up some of her things as she moving from her old house. so practically all the junks and her stuff at my house.
Really nothing much happened during the weekend. Just the routine kind of life on a Saturday and Sunday.
Mum's Health
She getting better & fresher but its scary 
to see her sleep especially when she starts to talk in her sleep. I can hear her voice change..i quickly wake her up. me being the scaredy cat
Dad
he likes to use his hp nowadays, no longer use the home phone. hahaha....excited
Me
Sigh i think my period is coming. Been behaving grouchy 
recently, even my colleagues & bf notice it. oopsss cancerian mood changes like the weather....
Actually i wanna share a pic in my blog entry but cannot lar...hmmm ....maybe i should keep on trying eh
posted @ Monday, August 02, 2004
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Thursday, July 29, 2004
Dear Blog
Ive not been regularly updating my block again it seems. Well cause certain things I do not know how to express in words. I just kept in my heart for me to ponder over & over again 
.
How am I going to start my blog for today’s entry Should I start with my Home? Personal BGR? Or shall I start day by day account. But there’s too much. Maybe I should just summarize.
Weekend
Stay at home on a Saturday do a lot of spring cleaning 
early in the morning, went to the market to get the ingredients to cook 
to welcome Wiyah’s family. So as to say really lots & lots of spring cleaning. Her family 
came in the afternoon. Wiyah was spotted with a short hair cut and still looks great with slim figure and all. Lucky her…to get a great hubby too..and share with you, her baby is damn real cute. Looks a lot like the father, Ekin. Well she shares a bit of her stories as a mother, lots of responsibilities she has to bear. Ekin is still in the learning process to adapt to the baby tantrums. Well it’s a learning phase for both of them wish them well.
Sunday, Hero parents came. All turn out quite well for a while.
Weekday
Mon Thursday
Mon I was on leave. My mother sickness came back again, her fear of being alone. I got to stay home and accompany her. I stay home and pacify her ….etc Tuesday go work treat my colleagues to Siam Kitchen 
, but Paul & Jack did not join us due to work commitment. Overall I think the food there is worth it for its buffet value. Yum I get to taste all the cuisine. I would recommend to my friend. Wednesday which was yesterday, I went to watch movie IRobot at Sembawang with my boyfriend. I think the movie is a typical robotics harm human kinda movie but I kinda like Will Smith now , he got this great physique and looks better than ever.
On the way back home, there’s some misunderstanding occurs between me and my boyfriend. Partly my fault for I didn’t get the message he is putting across and he raised his tone at me. Im used to people raising their tone towards me but not in public. I am after all a human with human emotions and I know the feeling of being embarrassed. I kept my cool for there is not point arguing in public and create a spectacle for ppl to witness and gossip. No way. But why I did so is because I got supporting reasons so as to why I decline to agree with his future plans. Finally he manage to see my point.
Also there is something about what his mother had said. I dont really mind because I already put in my best effort to welcome them. Again it is my fault to trigger my bf anger and patience. Maybe my biggest flaw is unable to take critism. Or I am being over sensitive. But I merely trying to tell my bf that I put in effort and hope he will give me the credit. Words of consolation. He did his part and explain to his mother and I salute him for his actions in protecting me. I really appreciate that. Then he start telling me, don’t because of that minor criticism im not going to respect his parents. Sigh. My parents brought me up equipped me with all the values of being a good human being. I wont be that bad so as to resort to not respecting his parents.
Ok till here I shall relate the whole week event that has been happening.
Personal, Self Thoughts
Am I that bad? Am I not practicing the values that my parents equipped me with? Am I over sensitive? Or I am unable to handle criticism. What should I do to be a better human so that I can relate to everybody, my parents, my siblings, my friends or to those related to me in some way or another without being misunderstood? Or maybe I should understand people more? Maybe I did not really take what I have mentioned earlier into account all this while.
Maybe my faith is not strong enough that is why I am unable to handle obstacles and challenges.
My parents
My dad is doing better each day just that he gets easily tired.
My mother …..i thought she is getting better but she is not. When night time falls her sickness came back again, she starts scolding yelling to the wall not sleeping eating but staring into space. Early morning starts again. Why.. Blog, it really pains me to see her in such a manner. Until when is HE testing my faith. Meantime I am trying my very best to put a strong exterior. But when it happens I just couldn’t help but sit and cry and ask why did this happen. Everything happens for a reason I know. Please GOD make my mum back like before. Save her please.
I dedicate to my Mother and my Hero
Because You Love Me
For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby
You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through through it all
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you
posted @ Thursday, July 29, 2004
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Friday, July 23, 2004
Dear blog,
Yesterday was my 23rd Birthday 
. I got no time to update my blog yesterday due to no privacy, always people walking to & fro my cubicle area 
. I receive lotsa well wishes from my colleagues 
and 1 wish from my best friend Wiyah .
Priscillia gave me an oriental pouch and a pink wallet as well as a card. I also received a sheepy soft toy.
Can’t wait for the buddy gang to give me the shopping voucher yeah yeah yeah im very ecstatic about it 
. But it will be on the Tuesday 27th because it’s our pay day when I will give out the treat. It’s a joint venture with Christina.
Still have yet to find a location so as where to go sigh 
I force my mother to sing me a birthday song, after much persuasion she did. Hahaha it sounds very funny though. But it’s the thought that counts.
Celebration? Well I went to Sembawang meeting up with my bf . I said that he bully me on my birthday but because he knock off late from work I dun really mind. He bought me the raspberry cheesecake which im craving to have. But suddenly I got the urge to eat mee soto so we went to the food court only me eating he did not cause his stomache is already so full. Guess what he brought the handphone with him and gave it to me, I feel bad cause he is excited about the phone as well but knowing im dying to get my hands on it he gave it to me and he use the old phone. He just use it for only a week and he is willing to part from him just for me. He said that if im happy he is happy for me. Sad ….i am very touched 
After that we sat down at coffeebean to eat the cheesecake, but to our dismay it has melted already haha. But I still eat it anyway. There we talked about what’s in store for us in the near future. 
Insyaallah…………………
Oh yeah I forget to give credit to my niece she gave me a cute charm bracelet. Haha I force her to wrap it up. Christina my workplc kaki gave me a handmade card, though look like a Christmas card, its really nice very neat and nice colour of the card.
Home
Nothing much happened. My Kak Yan & Kak Melati came to Jurong …baby sit mother for a while. Kak Yan already wears tudung. Alhamdullilah, glad & happy for the change. Maybe next in tow….cud be my Kak Ngah…or me 
….lom lar not ready. Insyaallah when the time comes.
Kak Melati insist that my mother go her house…..hmmm seems that mother is not really keen about the idea nowadays.
Dad laks…also ok…but there is some underlying conflicts, sigh hard to say.
Personal Thoughts….
I just hope that soon I will be out of the tangled web that Im stranded in right now.
I just hope my wishes will come true…………….
I love my loved ones……always now and then……..
Today's update
Nothing much, the sales department treat me for lunch treat but jas never joins in coz she got some lunch appointment. Eat lostsa ...hehe so full now cant type much hehehe after that Sandra took us for a joy ride....she lost her way ...hahah
posted @ Friday, July 23, 2004
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Wednesday, July 21, 2004
dear blog
today is already Wednesday, mid-week. And tomorrow is my birthday 
. No celebration juz a meet-up with my boyfriend . Ha! I already knew what he wanted to give me, so tomorrow we are going to IMM to get my bicycle. He is eager about the cycling thing. He got my interest at heart 
. Coz we got a big plan coming up with the cycling thing hehe. Insyaallah it will come true of what we had wished for over the years.
mother 
Today my abang long picked my mum up and send her to my Kak Melati house. Guess Kak melati is so used to having my mum that she willing to wait downstairs early in the morning for her arrival. My mother…..sigh..she getting better day by day but still have frequent uninvited “visitors” in her vision meaning she still seeing things. I still can’t figure out how it happen , I mean her condition. Maybe her next check-up need the doc to do a thorough check-up. Whenever I see her sleep I feel so peaceful so at ease for she sleeping soundly . Then some thoughts shudder me, what if one day she never opens her eyes again to look at me …my bf ever said to me once that I have to be prepared but to tell the truth and be honest with myself I am not ready. But if GOD is to take her, I have to be willing rite. Then life would be different without her coz I’m so immune to her naggings, tantrums etc that I will find a big chunk of my life is missing somewhere and Im aware of what is it. I juz pray for her best of health and may she stay youthful always.
Father 
Dad is another pitiful sight. Sigh 
. With the sickness he is facing, no one to really take cares of him like they did for my mum for they have this mind set that my dad is working and independent and able to take care of himself. How wrong they are. One thing abt my dad is that he follow the rules of what the doc have laid for him, he take oats for breakfast, wheatbread with margarine for in between lunch, but I wonder what is he taking for lunch. No one to prepare for him . Not that I cant prepare for him but he likes fish which I’m not gd at preparing. Sigh….i pray to GOD everytime to protect my loved ones…including Dad my AYAH. Hope his brain tumour will go away yeah u can say im expecting a miracle…but who knows it will happen…
Myself 
Hmmmm what can I say for myself. Im feeling very tired; yesterday night do a lot of washing then I also prepared Pauline, my colleague a birthday card. Hope she likes it. Suzanna my old time pal ask me whether im interested in taking mak andam course for she is taking at Zul Radi Couture. Then when I ask about the cost i’m almost shocked 
its abt 3k can pay in 3 installment plan. Aiyoh I can’t afford lar. So I have to forego the idea. Maybe in future after im settle with my studies, my marriage plans etc then I can sit down and think what course im taking next. I have lotsa interest in makeup but sees how.
Oh yeah I’m gonna be another year older tomorrow 
. Wishes? Haha its gonna be a secret 
. Not telling..even to you bloggers.
Im thinking of where im gonna treat my fellow work buddies……any suggestions? Hmmmm
posted @ Wednesday, July 21, 2004
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aka Lindah or Alin